Die Damhuise

Sit down children, Uncle Jai is going to to tell you a story. Yes Jessica, it is an educational story but you don't need to take notes. No Timmy, there are no dinosaurs in this one, but later I will tell you a story about African Bears and Elephants with four tusks; so sit still and don't fidget.

On the beach at Melkbosstrand is a restaurant called Die Damhuis. It is a very old building. Does any one want to guess how old it is? No Timmy, it is not a million years old -- and what did I tell you about fidgeting. No Matthew  it more than a hundred years old. It was build in the late 1700's. Back then it was just a shed for a farm. The walls were very thick because in those days they were built out of local stones and plastered with a mixture of cow manure, sand and hay. Yes Timmy, the walls have poo in them, and before you ask, they don't stink. I know a cow has four stomachs Jessica, the whole class knows. We covered that last week when we went to the slaughter house. Now can I please continue without any more interruptions, or must I call the gimp?

Good.

Back in the day it was used to store fishing boats, nets and dry fish. Johnny, stop picking your nose. Water from a fountain that still flows today, formed a dam by the shed. That is how the place got its name. Now tourists can go there, eat, drink, enjoy the sea view and marvel at how the building withstood hundreds of years of development.

That's all for today's history lesson, you can now go outside and play. Remember, only one clip of ammo per person.

Happy Halloween

So I head out of Cape Town on the beautiful R27 that runs along the coast up to Velddrif. As I was coming up to Melkbosstand I felt the car swerving to the right. After a few kilometers this became more and more pronounced. Now I did not want to appear drunk and embarrass myself in front of my fellow drivers (and something could be seriously wrong), so I pulled into The Caltex just before the Melkbosstrand Road (M19). My rear left tyre had deflated quite a bit. The culprit was a huge nail I must have picked up on the way. It was easy enough to fix. This time, unlike all the other times I had my puncture fixed, the attendant told me I could buy the kit for R65.00. If you are on a journey and the probability of flat or punctures are quite high, then one of these kits are essential; as well as a pair of pliers to remove the offending object.

The procedure is quite simple. Just pull out the object -- in my case, the nail -- take the first tool, stick it in the hole to make it bigger (no really just follow me with this), the take a piece of sticky rubber that looks like Freddy Kruger's pet worms, put it through the eye of a massive needle, stick it in the hole, then pull it out. Ta-da, your puncture is fixed. If you have something to inflate your tyres with you then you are a self-sufficient fixing machine. You can even start hunting down people who have punctures and offering to rescue them at a price. Also, the little rubber ooze-worms are available at most hardware stores, so it shouldn't be too hard to turn a profit on the venture (if you exclude the fact that petrol costs more than gold plated condoms).

So it looks like Halloween started off with a trick for me.